Hiding Places

The atheist finds no evidence of God, even when searching to the ends of the universe with every test imaginable. Yet the holy man of faith, if confined forever to his own little room or cell, would still discover the Lord's presence. He has purposely hidden himself from those who will not come by faith.

Conditional Loves

You'll never know how deep your faith is until you realize that the thing you want most in the world, the thing you've been asking and pleading and begging for, might not be granted to you. What are you to do, stop loving and believing and following God? This means that I never really loved Him, that my love was conditional upon getting my way. It wouldn't be so bad if I knew why He was withholding my heart's desire, but the not knowing, being kept in the dark is almost too much to bear. Of course, when the heart bleeds inside as though "almost to death", I'm reminded of Jesus at Gesthemene when He . . . even He . . . asked to be relieved of what it was He had to bear, and finally relented and accepted: "Not by my will, but Yours be done." In the end, no matter how difficult or painful, we must believe that God knows best. It doesn't stop the heart from breaking, however.

Vows

I have begun daily making small vows to God, things that I know I can do and won't break- little promises, but ones I intend on staying faithful and true to. Later, He will be requiring much more serious ones of me- more difficult promises- ones that will last for months, years, even a lifetime. You see, He wants to make sure you are faithful in the smallest of things before entrusting the big things to you. Be faithful, don't make vows you know you can't keep. Even promising to read a verse in His word everyday, to take a moment in prayer and thank Him, even this can go a long way. One day, you will have faith that can move mountains . . . and you started with a simple vow.

Lessons

Sometimes I think the Lord wants us to be confused at times, not knowing what to do or where we will go next. Not because He is evil, but because He can finally say to us, "Good. Now you can rely on ME for a while and less on yourself." It is in those times, if we truly believe, that we will drop to our knees and come before Him humbly. We have gone as far as we can go on our own. Now, at last, He can finally teach us something.

Forgiveness

I asked the Lord to deal with my enemies, the ones who wished nothing but evil for me, the ones who never let you forget your past mistakes, the dream stealers, the phony people- I asked God to pay them back for all the miseries they had caused . . . but He would have none of that. "Have you prayed for them?" He asked me. There was no part of my heart that wanted to pray for them at all, but I did. Suddenly, I found that my anger against them began to evaporate- there was an incredible sense of peace, a "patience" that I hadn't had before. I began to think of the times when they hadn't been so bad, when they had even done small acts of kindness which may have been monumental steps for them. In short, what had been hate in my heart transformed into love. This doesn't mean that the people I prayed for will change. Some seeds you plant will come to nothing, but every now and again a tree can grow amongst the weeds. The prayers might not have even been for them . . . the person changed was me.

Dusty Scrapbooks

Don't get too hung up on your past. All the missed opportunities, the times you wish you could get back or do over again- put them all away with the other dusty scrapbooks where they belong. There's a reason why the past is the past. It should be used only to learn lessons from and to make our tomorrows better, but it's never something to long for. He has much greater plans for you than that. Keep looking forward. What we have in front of us is infinitely better than what we've left behind.