Rough Drafts

I frequently look back in horror at the things I have done and said in my life, things that I either should have known better or things that I thought were clever and humorous, but on further reflection were really shameful things; things that were boastful, proud, hurtful, neglectful, condescending, immature, childish, even cowardly. Of course, the key is to forgive oneself, even if you must do it in small steps daily. This may be one of the hardest things any of us can ever do. How can we begin to forgive others when we cannot even do the same for ourselves? The worst thing is the utter realization that we probably didn't like ourselves very much to begin with. The pain within becomes the pain without. From here, the enemy can forge an immensely strong camp in our lives. This is one of the reasons sin spoils us, ruins what should have been a lavish feast. It's like the crack in your windshield that starts out as a speck but spreads bigger and bigger the longer we leave it alone. Wait long enough and the entire thing will have to be replaced. Just remember that if He is big enough to forgive us, to wipe the slate clean, to give us a fresh start, to begin our life's book without the horrible chapters we wrote on our own, then who are we to not do the same for ourselves?